This Judge Should Take his Grandchildren to a Drag Show

By Lynn Woolley August 28, 2026 89 No comment

Judge David Hittner (Wikipedia)

Some judges are just not qualified to serve.

A case in point is David Hittner, at this writing, an 87-year-old senior judge for the Southern District of Texas. Two times now, Judge Hittner has decided that drag shows are perfectly constitutional, and, in his opinion, if you don’t like them, just don’t go.

I’d like to invite Judge Hittner to attend one with me.

I’ll meet him at some public library and we can watch together as some man, dressed as a woman and ridiculously made up performs some interesting acts. Some if not most of those acts are not fit for children, and so the Texas Legislature tried to protect them. But even after Hittner’s original ruling was sent back by the appeals court, he ruled again against the law. My question is: who’s going to protect children from Judge Hittner?

AUDIO: Random Samplings of a Logical Mind (TO COME)

Of course, what’s a few drag shows to Judge Hittner?

Hittner seems flippant in his rulings, and if he’s having a merry old time frustrating the will of the State Legislature – and possibly most of the decent people of Texas. In his second ruling, he wrote of Texas Senate Bill 12:

The vast majority of the law’s numerous applications violate the First Amendment because all the performances that it has an actual impact on are constitutionally protected and are targeted for prohibition based on content and viewpoint.”

I take that to mean that he opposes the bill because it goes against the agenda of the LBGTQIA+ community – the same folks who put on our lovely pride parades. But let’s back up and take a look at what the law is all about.

Video: Drag shows in Tuscon – parents debate at school board meeting
(NOTE THAT THE SERIOUSLY LEWD SHOWS ARE BLOCKED BY YOU TUBE)

S.B. 12 did not specifically target drag shows.

Doing that might have doomed the bill even without the dubious ruling from Hittner. Instead, the bill prohibited – in the presence of children or persons under 18 years of age – performances that simulate sex or sex acts, and use certain props that are associated with sex, or outright nudity, or contact between a person and the buttocks, breasts and so on of another person – you know – the kind of stuff Hittner finds constitutional even for children.

Senate Bill 12 was written to be reasonable, but has the misfortune of going before an unreasonable judge. To make it even worse, Hittner is an appointee of Ronald Reagan, but even the great Ronaldus Maximus made a few mistakes. Hittner is one of them.

According to the Texas Tribune, the lawsuit originally named Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton, two counties three district attorneys and one county attorney by two community pride groups, two entertainment groups and Brigitte Bandit, a drag queen and longtime Texas LGBTQ+ rights activist. Following the 5^th Circuit’s ruling, only Paxton is left as a defendant.

As you might expect, the drag queen, Brigitte Bandit, him-or-her-self issued a statement (through the ACLU) defending the right of the gay community to put on lewd shows:

We use our performances to assert liberation, power, and joy with our community. As a lifelong Texan, I’m sick of this state trying to censor art and stoke hatred and violence against drag artists and the LGBTQIA+ community.

Judge Hittner seemed to agree that the State of Texas simply cannot enforce this law because it might offend the gay community, and to hell with parents and their children.

In a supreme middle finger to parents, Hittner has a piece of advice for those who don’t want their kids to see drag shows.

The Judge suggested that the best way avoid drag show is to avoid them:

Finally, for those who find such activities as described in this case offensive, the solution is relatively simple … just don’t go.”

Seriously, a federal district judge said that? Does he have a convenient way for Austin parents to make sure their kids aren’t bused to the annual gay pride parade? Is he certain that kids can visit a library and not be subjected to Drag Queen Story Hour? What about parents who have no regard for keeping their children safe from sexual performances such as those mentioned in S.B. 12?

It seems to me that some parents will not protect their children from lewd performances, and Judge Hittner is preventing the State from protecting them. So, for now, Hittner’s latest ruling is that the lewd performances described in S.B. 12 are constitutional, and that if little kids don’t want to see these performances, just don’t go.

Video: The Austin Pride Parade

I would hope that the Legislature will address this again in the upcoming session and that Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick will lead the fight to keep S.B.12 or something stronger in effect. Meanwhile, Attorney General Paxton says his office will appeal and that may send the case right back to the 5th U.S. Circuit Court.

And what are we to think of Judge David Hittner?

Remember, this bill applied to lewd performances “expected to be viewed by a child or a person younger than 18.” At 87, perhaps Hittner should be required to view some of the most extreme sex-shows that our children might be exposed to. Maybe this judge isn’t too old to learn a few things.

HERE IS THE TEXT OF S.B. 12:

AN ACT

relating to the authority to regulate sexually oriented

performances and to restricting those performances on the premises

of a commercial enterprise, on public property, or in the presence

of an individual younger than 18 years of age; authorizing a civil

penalty; creating a criminal offense.

BE IT ENACTED BY THE LEGISLATURE OF THE STATE OF TEXAS:

SECTION 1. Subtitle A, Title 9, Health and Safety Code, is

amended by adding Chapter 769 to read as follows:

CHAPTER 769. SEXUALLY ORIENTED PERFORMANCES

Sec. 769.001. DEFINITIONS. In this chapter:

(1) “Premises” has the meaning assigned by Section

46.03, Penal Code.

(2) “Sexually oriented performance” has the meaning

assigned by Section 43.28, Penal Code.

Sec. 769.002. CERTAIN SEXUALLY ORIENTED PERFORMANCES

PROHIBITED ON PREMISES OF COMMERCIAL ENTERPRISE; CIVIL PENALTY;

INJUNCTION. (a) A person who controls the premises of a commercial

enterprise may not allow a sexually oriented performance to be

presented on the premises in the presence of an individual younger

than 18 years of age.

(b) A person who violates this section is liable to this

state for a civil penalty of not more than $10,000 for each

violation.

(1) recover the civil penalty imposed under this

section; or

(2) obtain a temporary or permanent injunction to

restrain the violation.

(d) An action under this section may be brought in a

district court in:

(1) Travis County; or

(2) a county in which any part of the violation occurs.

(e) The attorney general shall deposit a civil penalty

collected under this section in the state treasury to the credit of

the general revenue fund.

(f) The attorney general may recover reasonable expenses

incurred in bringing an action under this section, including court

costs, attorney’s fees, investigative costs, witness fees, and

deposition expenses.

SECTION 2. Chapter 243, Local Government Code, is amended

by adding Section 243.0031 to read as follows:

Sec. 243.0031. AUTHORITY TO REGULATE CERTAIN SEXUALLY

ORIENTED PERFORMANCES. (a) In this section, “sexually oriented

performance” has the meaning assigned by Section 43.28, Penal Code.

(b) Subject to Subsection (c), a municipality or county may

regulate sexually oriented performances as the municipality or

county considers necessary to promote the public health, safety, or

welfare.

oriented performance:

(1) on public property; or

(2) in the presence of an individual younger than 18

years of age.

(d) Except as provided by Subsection (c), this section does

not limit the authority of a municipality to license, tax,

suppress, prevent, or otherwise regulate theatrical or other

exhibitions, shows, or amusements under Section 215.032.

SECTION 3. Subchapter B, Chapter 43, Penal Code, is amended

by adding Section 43.28 to read as follows:

Sec. 43.28. CERTAIN SEXUALLY ORIENTED PERFORMANCES

PROHIBITED. (a) In this section:

(1) “Sexual conduct” means:

(A) the exhibition or representation, actual or

simulated, of sexual acts, including vaginal sex, anal sex, and

masturbation;

(B) the exhibition or representation, actual or

simulated, of male or female genitals in a lewd state, including a

state of sexual stimulation or arousal;

marketed as useful primarily for the sexual stimulation of male or

female genitals;

(D) actual contact or simulated contact

occurring between one person and the buttocks, breast, or any part

of the genitals of another person; or

(E) the exhibition of sexual gesticulations

using accessories or prosthetics that exaggerate male or female

sexual characteristics.

(2) “Sexually oriented performance” means a visual

performance that:

(A) features:

(i) a performer who is nude, as defined by

Section 102.051, Business & Commerce Code; or

(ii) any other performer who engages in

sexual conduct; and

(B) appeals to the prurient interest in sex.

(b) A person commits an offense if, regardless of whether

compensation for the performance is expected or received, the

person engages in a sexually oriented performance:

(1) on public property at a time, in a place, and in a

manner that could reasonably be expected to be viewed by a child; or

(2) in the presence of an individual younger than 18

years of age.

SECTION 4. If any provision of this Act or its application

to any person or circumstance is held invalid, the invalidity does

not affect other provisions or applications of this Act that can be

given effect without the invalid provision or application, and to

this end the provisions of this Act are declared severable.

SECTION 5. This Act takes effect September 1, 2023.

______________________________ ______________________________

President of the Senate Speaker of the House

I hereby certify that S.B. No. 12 passed the Senate on

April 5, 2023, by the following vote: Yeas 20, Nays 11;

May 25, 2023, Senate refused to concur in House amendments and

requested appointment of Conference Committee; May 26, 2023, House

granted request of the Senate; May 28, 2023, Senate adopted

Conference Committee Report by the following vote: Yeas 19,

Nays 12.

______________________________

Secretary of the Senate

I hereby certify that S.B. No. 12 passed the House, with

amendments, on May 22, 2023, by the following vote: Yeas 93,

Nays 45, six present not voting; May 26, 2023, House granted

request of the Senate for appointment of Conference Committee;

May 28, 2023, House adopted Conference Committee Report by the

following vote: Yeas 87, Nays 54, two present not voting.

______________________________

Chief Clerk of the House

Lynn Woolley is a Texas-based author, broadcaster, and songwriter. Follow his podcast at https://www.PlanetLogic.us. Check out his author’s page at https://www.Amazon.com/author/lynnwoolley. Order books direct from Lynn at https://PlanetLogicPress.Square.Site.

Email Lynn at lwoolley9189@gmail.com.

Hittner might find this book dull and not lewd enough for chidren under 18.

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